Picture by Amy Rader Photographer!
By: Amy E
I never ever thought I would be as excited as I am right now about someone else using the bathroom. But I am and I want to share why. Recently the Tiny One has been delving into the world of potty training. He has been very successful at it so far and is quickly getting the hang of the process. But it has been the past two nights that have been some of the highlights of my short parenting career.
For the past few nights, the Tiny One has successfully pooped on the potty, flushed it on his own, waved goodbye and then washed his hands. Seeing this skill click for my toddler was such an amazing moment for me. The pure JOY and PRIDE on his face said it all as he exclaimed: "Look Mama, A BIG ONE!!!!" As I studied his enlightened face, my heart exploded into a million pieces as I shared his accomplishment and also realized simultaneously that he was quickly growing up and this was another giant leap forward in his road to independence. It seems like every single day he astonishes me with something new from putting on his own pajamas or clothes to helping me take out the trash. Each day passes by so quickly and sprinkled within it are these little moments that make all the work we do worthwhile. For now, I take the time to enjoy the moment and then lock it away in my heart. My life has changed so much and now I live for the moments like these-the feeling is unbeatable!
What kinds of little moments with your kids have impacted you? A goal scored in a soccer game, the first time they sleep all night long, the moment they got their license?
Thank you to psychologist and author, John Rosemond for allowing me to share a section of his instruction on toilet training from his superb book, John Rosemond’s New Parent Power!, with all of you at Cape Cod Mommies!
By Tracy Lamperti,
Psychotherapist, Educator, Consultant
As a new mom 13 years ago, it wasn’t long before I was fully immersed in the questions of toilet training. My mother informed me that her children were fully trained around one year of age! Really Mom?? Hmmm. That just clearly wasn’t going to happen with my first child! But I also knew that my very bright two year old was capable of many things and somehow it just seemed a bit insulting to him to be changing his diaper at a certain point. The pull-ups seemed like such a good idea, but essentially ended up just being a different type of (less absorbent) diaper.
One day, we were well into the toilet training process and I knew my son was aware of his body, what it did, and what he was supposed to do. I watch as he made a choice to continue to play, in lieu of stopping to go to the potty. The result…he wet his pants. The result of wetting his pants, I punished him.
I relayed this story to the moms, (my new best friends in my “mommy and me” group), where we shared all of the business of our children. The response was a mixture of silence and outrage. “I would NEVER punish a two year old for wetting his pants!” I like and respect these moms very much, but we didn’t see eye to eye on
The punishment was the loss of a toy and there was no amount of shaming on my part. It was very simple.
“You knew that you had to go potty and you chose to keep playing instead. Next time, stop playing for the brief moment that it will take you to go potty and then get right back to playing.”
That’s all from me for now. I encourage your comments at the end of this blog post. Some of you will agree, some not.
Thank you again to John Rosemond for allowing me to share his work!
Please visit his Amazon page here.
Please visit his website here.
And his facebook pagehere.
Please see www.tracylamperti.com for more information about working with children and families.
If you would like 1:1 assistance, please contact Tracy Lamperti for a consultation.
Tracy Lamperti, LMHC, BCETS
Psychotherapist, Educator, Consultant
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