“Children do not generally have ‘rights’ in a divorce or custody case. It is up to two parents who love the child to remember their obligation to the child and set their rights straight in their own mind.”
Most parents recognize their child is going through a hard time in divorce and try to ease the trouble as much as they can. I have been involved in far too many cases, however, where both parents are acting like they are on the high road. In other words, they are “less” at fault and know “better” about the needs of the child. Generally, this does not work for a child.
When parents are in conflict about the child’s needs, the child is usually best served by a third party stepping in to make suggestions, with the child’s best interest at heart. Whether the parents think they are hiding their conflict from the child or not, the child is the subject of the conflict, which is never a good thing.
This third party could be a therapist who specializes in marriage and divorce. It could be a guardian ad litem, and rarely, but still possible, it could be an attorney for the child.
If you are going to look for a therapist, like myself, to assist with the process, the therapist should most definitely start with both parents, if possible together. One parent or the other should not be aligned with the therapist. That does not serve the child’s best interest.
If you are considering seeking help from a therapist for your child in a custody or divorce case, please familiarize yourself with this contract. The components of this contract should be the guidelines of the therapy. http://www.tracylamperti.com/Custody-Cases.pdf
Please consider getting support if you are going through a major separation, married or not married, especially if you have children. Family and friends can be very helpful, but even just a few sessions with a specialist can make a big difference.