 By: Coach Pam Wills
Here is something to think about as you slide into the New Year. (Guten Rutsch is a German expression I learned when I lived there…it means literally, Have a good slide! Always thought that was catchy. But I digress…) Check the picture I found this week. I posted it on my Facebook page but you might have missed it. Maybe it’s tough to swallow but I think it is spot on. How about you? Leave me your comments, I want to hear all about it! About Pamela As your Confidence Coach, it is my mission to guide you from darkness into the light of feeling strong, confident and sexy so you can Get Your Sizzle On!™ The boring stuff: I earned my Certified Professional Coach (CPC) credential from Fowler-Wainwright International and my BA in English Lit from Georgetown University. I’ve been writing and teaching professionally for over 20 years and currently publish my own weekly blog and eZine. The FUN stuff: I am currently an Expert on the following awesome websites: LawofAttractionKey.com; LifeBusinessGrowth.com; Soulwoman eMagazine I’m also a Speaker for B.I.G. Women’s Network in Massachusetts. (Fun fact: I’m also a choreographer for community theater in my spare time! ;) My newest workshops, “Master Your Stage Fright” and “Brains + Beauty = YOU!” are scheduled for early 2013 at various locations on Cape Cod, MA. Contact me at info@pamelawills.com for deets. Book a FREE Spark Session with me at www.PamelaWills.com/schedule-session/ so I can help you build your courage, grow your confidence and Get Your Sizzle On!™ My intention is to see you push through your fears, move into that shimmering light of confidence and really SIZZLE with reawakened charisma! Find out how to feel strong and confident about being your true Self, a unique and powerful woman at www.PamelaWills.com.
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Touch: One of the most important and life affirming actions we can take, every day. And simultaneously, one of the most important things we can give and receive each day. How many times did you experience touch today? One? Three? Ten times? (Hint: If you feel great, it was probably enough.) 
When was the last time you held someone’s hand? When was the last time you touched someone without fear, anxiety or doubt? When was the last time you felt the warmth of someone else’s touch without guilt, shame, regret, despair or another negative emotion? If you’ve gone longer than one week or even one day without healthy, healing touch, it’s time to change that and start THRIVING. 
Do you need a hug? Why not give your Self a big hug? Embracing your Self physically is a great start toward getting and giving regular gifts of healing touch. 
Touch is one of the most important elements we all need to help us THRIVE, an act that involves far more than mere survival. BTW, touch does not have to be sexual to be healing and effective. =) 
I want one of these: The Hug Chair! 
Even if you live alone, you can always give your Self a big hug! Here’s an alternative challenge: Give the gift of touch by giving out free hugs! 
(Side benefit of giving free hugs: You rock your confidence muscle each time! Please practice this choice responsibly; set and state your boundaries clearly; and always remain in a busy, well-lit, public space.)
Even if the only touch you can manage today is to shake your own hand or give your Self a scalp massage, give it a try. I am sure it will make you smile. *Pamela earned her Certified Professional Coach (CPC) credential from Fowler-Wainwright International and her BA in English Literature from Georgetown University. She has been writing and teaching professionally for over 20 years but continues to learn and improve her talents, gifts and skills with experience and training. Her unique background includes PR and marketing for the US Army and a natural wood finishes manufacturer (both in Germany), translations from German to English for a global retailer, choreography and dance instruction for theater, plus English language training for foreign executives. Pamela has written travel articles, a regular column on cultural differences, book reviews, guest blog posts, her own weekly blog and eZine and she speaks frequently at live events, on radio and TV. Pamela is a featured coach on the Expert Panels of Kristen Howe’s www.LawofAttractionKey.com and Kerry Swetmon’s www.LifeBusinessGrowth.com. In addition, Pamela is on the Speakers Bureau of B.I.G. Women’s Network in Massachusetts. Helping others increase their confidence is Pamela’s passion because she learned the hard way how important confidence really is for success in life. She wants to spare you the hard, dark journey she took and set you on a bright, happy path as quickly as possible! To learn more and schedule your own complimentary SPARK Session, contact Pamela today. Do you ever feel like no one listens to you? Do you hear your Self repeating the same ultimatums over and over again? Do you sometimes feel like throwing your hands in the air and giving up?? Do you feel like you never get the respect you desire or deserve?
Whether you’re at home or at work, respect can be a real thorn for those of us with confidence issues, past or present. It seems nearly impossible to get people to cooperate when you can’t even get them to listen, right?? Believe me, I know what I’m talking about here. As a dance teacher and occasional substitute teacher in the past, I’ve often wrestled with getting a roomful of noisy students to settle down and listen up. Part of my struggle is my low tone of voice, but previously my struggles centered around uncertainty and low confidence. So, how did I change things, you ask? First of all, I worked on building up my courage. I just jumped in with both feet and kept on putting my Self into situations that would force me to grow and force me to command respect. For instance, I just finished choreographing a community theater production of Cabaret (have I mentioned this recently?…lol), during which conflicting personalities and styles of learning combined with limited rehearsal time often resulted in a few unhappy, resentful dancers who were sometimes unwilling to accept me as the teacher. Sigh. Well, if our audiences are any indication, we have all succeeded despite our trials and challenges, despite our issues with giving and getting respect. So, what is my formula for getting respect? I hear you asking me. Here is my awesome-sauciness recipe: 1) Talk to your Self with respect If you don’t, then really, who will?? 2) Surround your Self with other people who treat you with respect Kind of obvious, no? Even if this seems impossible in your current circumstances, vow to ignore your haters. Treat them like the crickets they are — silent whenever you get too close. 3) Treat others with respect Duh. 4) Step up to the plate Be the lion. Practice courage daily. Take a chance on doing something you really want to do. Stand up for what you believe in, for a friend, for your Self. Speak up. Speak your truth, your OWN truth. Stop avoiding conflict, embrace it and learn from it. Courage is a muscle — build it, flex it, keep it limber. 5) Follow through If you say you’re going to do something, do it. If you threaten to punish your kids with no TV for a week, stick to it. If you promise to reward them for something, do so. Be a person true to your word. 6) Accomplish, finish things Don’t leave stuff undone. Once you buy the paint to re-do your bathroom walls, get out the brushes and get painting! If you take a class (or your child does), then finish it — don’t make excuses to bow out and quit. Goes hand in glove with #5. 7) Ditch perfection It’s really okay to be in the learning stages of things while you’re learning things. It’s really okay if your house isn’t perfectly clean all. the. time. It’s really okay if your relationship or marriage isn’t as perfectly passionate as it was back in the day. Priorities shift, life goes in cycles, things and people change. Respect change and it will respect you. Is feeling respected important to you? Do you feel like you get enough respect at home and/or at work? Hit REPLY and tell me about it. The more I know about your challenges and successes, the better I can help you! *Pamela earned her Certified Professional Coach (CPC) credential from Fowler-Wainwright International and her BA in English Literature from Georgetown University. She has been writing and teaching professionally for over 20 years but continues to learn and improve her talents, gifts and skills with experience and training. Her unique background includes PR and marketing for the US Army and a natural wood finishes manufacturer (both in Germany), translations from German to English for a global retailer, choreography and dance instruction for theater, plus English language training for foreign executives. Pamela has written travel articles, a regular column on cultural differences, book reviews, guest blog posts, her own weekly blog and eZine and she speaks frequently at live events, on radio and TV. Pamela is a featured coach on the Expert Panels of Kristen Howe’s www.LawofAttractionKey.com and Kerry Swetmon’s www.LifeBusinessGrowth.com. In addition, Pamela is on the Speakers Bureau of B.I.G. Women’s Network in Massachusetts. Helping others increase their confidence is Pamela’s passion because she learned the hard way how important confidence really is for success in life. She wants to spare you the hard, dark journey she took and set you on a bright, happy path as quickly as possible! To learn more and schedule your own complimentary SPARK Session, contact Pamela today. You know what I’ve noticed? Some people just aren’t comfortable with the idea of sincere positivity coming at them. Try to be nice to some people and they kind of snicker at you. Sometimes they even sneer a bit. And if you dare attempt to hug some others, they might just go scurrying for the door. They just cannot handle it! I used be that snickering, sneering, scurrying person, the very one who got very uptight around super positive people. Most of the time, I would brand the positive ones as superficial, stupid or insincere. Even when I could sense that they were none of the above and that their positivity somehow (God only knows how) was sincere, the bitter cynic in me just could not stand to be around so much happy cheery positivity. Seriously! It hurt me physically. Gave me migraines. Made me nauseous. I KNOW you know what I’m talking about here. Of course, my pseudo-intellectual ex-husband AND my Queen’s English wannabe rebound man both fed right into my less-than-adorable judgemental stance. They both LOVED looking down their noses at anyone and everyone who went through life with a smile on his or her face. Did their best to personally wipe it right off those faces as quickly as possible. Made positivity look like the stupidest, uncoolest (look Ma, I just made up a word) and least desirable trait to display. Of course, I joined right in with their kindergarten games. Suited my immature Self just perfectly back then. 
Fast forward to the present. At this point, I have outrun and/or defeated the biggest demons of my lifetime so far. I’ve dealt with divorce and all the drama that goes with it, battled and won court case after court case against a very stubborn and difficult ex-husband and “father” for full custody of my child, dived down into the depths of all kinds of insecurities, despondencies and uncertainties and returned to the surface of my scarred life filled with hope, laughter and yes, the dreaded “P” word. Today, I am not afraid nor ashamed to admit that I am a total positivity junkie. I love tossing words like “awesome”, “super” and “fabulous” around. Of course! I feel I have too much time and too many barbed comments in my past to make up for. I wore my coolness like so much heavy armor, protecting my fears and insecurities. Now I sometimes feel like Ebenezer Scrooge’s friend Jacob Marley with his yards of clanking chains, atoning for past cynicism. Now, I guarantee you that every last word out of my mouth is sincerely felt and meant. But I know that many can’t imagine how that feels, let alone that it is possible. The very idea makes them uncomfortable. I know that many simply decide that I can’t possibly mean everything I say. So they keep their distance. They say what they have to say and then move away as quickly as possible so as not to be infected by my smiles. 
…but not exactly fans, either… 
I know this, because that used to be me. I used to be a hater. Hated anything and everything that seemed too chirpy or happy or in-my-face positive. Now, I know better. Now, I’ll take positivity and all that goes along with being a hug-and-smile kind of gal. Especially if the alternative is to be snickering, sneering and scurrying or some other kind of whining crankypants with no sugar! Now, I’ll take sugar any day. You? 
*Pamela earned her Certified Professional Coach (CPC) credential from Fowler-Wainwright International and her BA in English Literature from Georgetown University. She has been writing and teaching professionally for over 20 years but continues to learn and improve her talents, gifts and skills with experience and training.
Helping others increase their confidence is Pamela’s passion because she learned the hard way how important confidence really is for success in life. She wants to spare you the hard, dark journey she took and set you on a bright, happy path as quickly as possible! To learn more and schedule your own complimentary SPARK Session, contact Pamela today. 
About Pamela
Pamela uses her past experiences and hard-won successes to guide people from the darkness of difficult and controlling relationships to the lightness of feeling strong, confident and sexy. She does this by helping them take on and achieve regular challenges with success, learn to treat themselves with kindness and respect, set and meet high expectations for themselves and finally, tap their innate charisma and get their sizzle on! Pamela earned her Certified Professional Coach (CPC) credential from Fowler-Wainwright International and her BA in English Literature from Georgetown University. She has been writing and teaching professionally for over 20 years but continues to learn and improve her talents, gifts and skills with experience and training. Her unique background includes PR and marketing for the US Army and a natural wood finishes manufacturer (both in Germany), translations from German to English for a global retailer, choreography and dance instruction for theater, plus English language training for foreign executives. Pamela has written travel articles, a regular column on cultural differences, book reviews, guest blog posts, her own weekly blog and eZine and she speaks on radio and TV shows. Her most recent exciting news includes her inclusion as a featured coach on the Expert Panels of two major websites: Go Big! Coach Kristen Howe’s www.LawofAttractionKey.com and savvy businesswoman Kerry Swetmon’s www.LifeBusinessGrowth.com. In addition, Pamela has been added to the Speakers Bureau of B.I.G. Women’s Network in Massachusetts. Helping others increase their confidence levels has become Pamela’s passion because she learned the hard way how important confidence really is for success in love and relationships, parenting, career and business, friendships and life in general. She wants to spare others the hard, dark journey she took and set them on a bright, happy path as quickly as possible! To learn more and schedule your own complimentary SPARK Session, contact Pamela today. Tags compliments, exercise, feel good medicine, fitness, health, leader, lipstick, mental-health,
more powerful, public speaker, purposeful, self-esteem speak up, thankful, volunteer, walk Need a shot of confidence? Here are nine of my favorite instant boosters for you: Confidence Booster #1 Stand and sit up straight! All. The. Time. You will automatically feel taller, more attractive, more powerful. Confidence Booster #2 Walk faster! Put some spring in your step. You will instantly feel more purposeful, important and confident. Confidence Booster #3 Look sharp! Take a few minutes to check your Self in the mirror before you go out. Ladies, a little lipstick can’t hurt. And guys, shave much?… Confidence Booster #4 Be thankful! Think of six things each morning and six more each night to be thankful for. Say them out loud, write them down. Confidence Booster #5 Give compliments! Look for the best in others; soon you (and everyone else) will start to notice the best in your Self. Confidence Booster #6 Sit up front! Why hide in the back row when you can see better, hear better up front? Face your fear, don’t hide! Confidence Booster #7 Speak up! Raise that hand to become a better public speaker, a more confident thinker and recognized as a leader. Confidence Booster #8 Work that body! Exercise is feel good medicine and fitness has a huge effect on self-esteem. Just do it. Really! Confidence Booster #9 Volunteer! Giving your time to others who need your help and expertise makes life all the sweeter. Try it! Give a few of these boosters a try and see if you don’t start to feel better about your Self. You know what I always say, right?… What have you got to lose??? Get my FREE eBooklet, "50 Instant Confidence Boosters" with 40 more of these confidence tips when you sign up for my FREE weekly ezine at www.PamelaWills.com. About Pamela Pamela uses her past experiences and hard-won successes to guide people from the darkness of difficult and controlling relationships to the lightness of feeling strong, confident and sexy. She does this by helping them take on and achieve regular challenges with success, learn to treat themselves with kindness and respect, set and meet high expectations for themselves and finally, tap their innate charisma and get their sizzle on! Pamela earned her Certified Professional Coach (CPC) credential from Fowler-Wainwright International and her BA in English Literature from Georgetown University. She has been writing and teaching professionally for over 20 years but continues to learn and improve her talents, gifts and skills with experience and training. Her unique background includes PR and marketing for the US Army and a natural wood finishes manufacturer (both in Germany), translations from German to English for a global retailer, choreography and dance instruction for theater, plus English language training for foreign executives. Pamela has written travel articles, a regular column on cultural differences, book reviews, guest blog posts, her own weekly blog and eZine and she speaks on radio and TV shows. Her most recent exciting news includes her inclusion as a featured coach on the Expert Panels of two major websites: Go Big! Coach Kristen Howe’s www.LawofAttractionKey.com and savvy businesswoman Kerry Swetmon’s www.LifeBusinessGrowth.com. In addition, Pamela has been added to the Speakers Bureau of B.I.G. Women’s Network in Massachusetts. Helping others increase their confidence levels has become Pamela’s passion because she learned the hard way how important confidence really is for success in love and relationships, parenting, career and business, friendships and life in general. She wants to spare others the hard, dark journey she took and set them on a bright, happy path as quickly as possible! To learn more and schedule your own complimentary SPARK Session, contact Pamela today. 
This idea is on my mind today. Finding the courage to open our hearts might be one of the most challenging actions we take. Trusting after getting hurt is especially challenging.Do you trust yourself to choose a potential lover wisely next time? Will you allow yourself to trust that your choice is a good one? Are you ready to trust your heart to the lucky person you choose? About Pamela
As your Confidence Coach, I strive to help you grow your courage, build your confidence and tap your innate charisma. You need to work with me If you: - don’t know how to use your own voice anymore - used to feel like you could do anything - wonder why no one listens to you - feel invisible most of the time - don’t have a plan for your future - can’t even imagine your way into next week - wonder when your goals disappeared like that - feel all bottled up like wine with a dry cork - wish you could just run away some days - hate living in an emotional battlefield or wasteland - can’t remember the last time you felt good about yourself - don’t know when someone last complimented you on anything - feel as if flirting was something you did in another lifetime - don’t remember how to have fun - This list goes on and on, doesn’t it?… I know what it’s like and how to help because the same thing happened to me. Now that I have successfully gained courage, built confidence and tapped my own charisma, I can also guide YOU through the steps it takes to succeed and SIZZLE. Book your SPARK Session with me today. Email me directly at Pamela@ElasticityCoaching.com or visit my website at www.PamelaWills.com. Let’s talk. Pamela Wills, CPC Pamela Wills Coaching www.PamelaWills.com Like me on Twitter - Follow me! LinkedIn - Add me! Referrals are like chocolate...sweet and necessary! =) What’s your version of freedom? 
How do you go from this: 
and leave this behind: 
to find your Self escaping the cage and flying away like the butterfly in this image? 
Think you can’t do this?? Well, I KNOW you can, because I already did it. If I can do it, so can you! So tell me: What’s your version of freedom? Does it involve your heart? 
Your mind? 
Your finances? 
Your choices? 
Whatever it involves, tell me: Are you there yet? If not, why not?? About Pamela
As your Confidence Coach, I strive to help you grow your courage, build your confidence and tap your innate charisma. You need to work with me If you: - don’t know how to use your own voice anymore - used to feel like you could do anything - wonder why no one listens to you - feel invisible most of the time - don’t have a plan for your future - can’t even imagine your way into next week - wonder when your goals disappeared like that - feel all bottled up like wine with a dry cork - wish you could just run away some days - hate living in an emotional battlefield or wasteland - can’t remember the last time you felt good about yourself - don’t know when someone last complimented you on anything - feel as if flirting was something you did in another lifetime - don’t remember how to have fun - This list goes on and on, doesn’t it?… I know what it’s like and how to help because the same thing happened to me. Now that I have successfully gained courage, built confidence and tapped my own charisma, I can also guide YOU through the steps it takes to succeed and SIZZLE. Book your SPARK Session with me today. Email me directly at Pamela@ElasticityCoaching.com or visit my website at www.PamelaWills.com. Let’s talk. Pamela Wills, CPC Pamela Wills Coaching www.PamelaWills.com Like me on Twitter - Follow me! LinkedIn - Add me! Referrals are like chocolate...sweet and necessary! =) Yesterday afternoon during our walk on one of Cape Cod’s many gorgeous beaches, my even more gorgeous daughter offered to help me with my blog. She is filled to the brim with all kinds of ideas, so I took the bait. Her solution? The photo I’ve included below. She thought the words might be helpful to my readers, because she is one of them. She has been practicing looking ahead since we left a very difficult situation in Germany and moved to Cape Cod to be with family almost five years ago. As a result, she has also become much more confident and much more optimistic. It is pretty cool to see daily proof of how positive thoughts and actions change a person’s life for the better. Thought for the week: 
Which way are you looking?
Do you need to make a change? When will you make that change? What’s it going to take to push you ahead? Whatever it is, whatever it takes, DO IT. Your life will thank you for it. ———————————————————- About Pamela As your Confidence Coach, I strive to help you grow your courage, build your confidence and tap your innate charisma. You need to work with me If you: - don’t know how to use your own voice anymore - used to feel like you could do anything - wonder why no one listens to you - feel invisible most of the time - don’t have a plan for your future - can’t even imagine your way into next week - wonder when your goals disappeared like that - feel all bottled up like wine with a dry cork - wish you could just run away some days - hate living in an emotional battlefield or wasteland - can’t remember the last time you felt good about yourself - don’t know when someone last complimented you on anything - feel as if flirting was something you did in another lifetime - don’t remember how to have fun - This list goes on and on, doesn’t it?… I know what it’s like and how to help because the same thing happened to me. Now that I have successfully gained courage, built confidence and tapped my own charisma, I can also guide YOU through the steps it takes to succeed and SIZZLE. Book your SPARK Session with me today. Email me directly at Pamela@ElasticityCoaching.com or visit my website at www.PamelaWills.com. Let’s talk. Pamela Wills, CPC Pamela Wills Coaching www.PamelaWills.com Like me on Twitter - Follow me! LinkedIn - Add me! Referrals are like chocolate...sweet and necessary! =) 
Here is a new idea: Trust your body. Listen to it. Pay attention to how it feels, what it want and what it doesn’t want. Understand that you and your body are partners. What have you got to lose? A few pounds, like me??… =) About Pamela
As your Confidence Coach, I strive to help you grow your courage, build your confidence and tap your innate charisma. You need to work with me If you: - don’t know how to use your own voice anymore - used to feel like you could do anything - wonder why no one listens to you - feel invisible most of the time - don’t have a plan for your future - can’t even imagine your way into next week - wonder when your goals disappeared like that - feel all bottled up like wine with a dry cork - wish you could just run away some days - hate living in an emotional battlefield or wasteland - can’t remember the last time you felt good about yourself - don’t know when someone last complimented you on anything - feel as if flirting was something you did in another lifetime - don’t remember how to have fun - This list goes on and on, doesn’t it?… I know what it’s like and how to help because the same thing happened to me. Now that I have cessfully gained courage, built confidence and tapped my own charisma, I can also guide YOU through the steps it takes to succeed and SIZZLE. Book your SPARK Session with me today. Email me directly at Pamela@ElasticityCoaching.com or visit my website at www.PamelaWills.com. Let’s talk. Pamela Wills, CPC Pamela Wills Coachin www.PamelaWills.com Like me on Facebook Twitter - Follow me! LinkedIn - Add me! Referrals are like chocolate...sweet and necessary! =) |
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