When I was a childless, unmarried lass, I lived with my handsome boyfriend in a one bedroom apartment with our dog. We had time, money, and excessive public displays of affection.
(Examine how naive and well rest these childless humans are.)
These days we have so much more.
“Yet with great awesomeness comes great responsibilty” I think Abraham Lincoln said that. Having two small children, two full time jobs, being homeowners, pet owners, flower waterers, trash taker outers, family members, and friends to others leaves a person stretched in a million directions.
It’s beautiful and it’s exhausting. Almost everything about being a parent is a paradox. You don’t want to go back to your old life, you are so thankful for your family, yet you currently just want to go hide from your family and lay face down in your bed.
Now when we were dating I went to Bikram yoga 4-5 times per week. My man friend would head out to the sea to soothe his soul. He is a fisherman. It’s in his blood, it’s part of who he is. His grandfather owned the bait shop on Russells corner in downtown Sandwich. This picture hangs in our kitchen and every morning the boys say “Oooo Daddy’s papa. Big fishy!”
Looks like their Dad got some of the fishing skills handed down to him.
Now he doesn’t get to go fishing half as much as he would like to, but he still goes. I see that it’s important to him. It definitely makes him a happier person. It is how he relaxes.
Now for me as the Mom, I had two children and then rewrote the oldest story in the book. I was taking care of everyone else and neglecting myself. Slowly, I stopped going to yoga. Just “too busy” or when I would have the opportunity to go, i’d lay in my bed alone instead. Knowing it would be the only solid two hours that week of alone time.
Eventually you always hit a wall. You can’t take care of everyone else if you don’t reflill your own cup. I had practiced Bikram yoga for years and had benefited greatly physically. I was strong and energetic. But the mental benefits were even greater. Such stress relief. Teaching your body to effectively calm down. It’s a 90 minute open eyed meditation. The teacher talks and you move your body. You get to take time out of your crazy life to just focus on yourself in the mirror.
Therefore when Bikram Yoga Cape Cod sent out an email saying that they would be doing the first Teacher training in New England at my happy place, I knew what I had to do. Fine, if I can’t make it my hobby, i’ll make it my job. My own health and wellness is that important to me. I had always wanted to go to the 9 week teacher training in LA, but at the same point in my life, I also really wanted to start a family.
Yet, here it was right down the street from me. So when opportunity strikes, you must jump on it. Yes, I have a 3&2 year old. Yes, I have a husband. Yes, I have a job.It would be the most amount of time I would spend away from my kiddos since I laid eyes on them. I knew they would support me though. All I'm doing is try to build the happy life that they deserve.
So I packed my lunch box and headed to yoga camp, 3 week immersion program. 9 am- 11pm every day. Sundays off to rest and hug my kids all day long.
I repeated, “we can do anything for 3 weeks.” to my husband over and over. Even though I think I was just saying it to myself.
With the help of my Dad who would drive two hours here every Monday to hang with the homies, a school they love, supportive in-laws, and better friends than I deserve, I did it. If you want to read more about my training experience you can check it out here.
I just decided one day, that if you get so caught up in being an adult that you stop taking time to do the things you love, what’s the point? Do want your children to see the picture you have painted of adulthood as go to work, eat dinner, bitch about work, watch TV, sleep.
No, that’s just not for us. I want my boys to grow up in a world where they know the joy of catching a big fish or how fun it is to throw seaweed at Dad when we are clamming. I want my boys to grow up around the yoga studio. To see how happy people can be when they take care of themselves. How good it feels to be strong and run your body it’s full potential. How easy it is to have the energy to take care of others, when you continue to take care of yourself as well.
Finding balance, isn't that the name of the game?
Britt is a Beach bum, Mom, Wife, Sister, Friend, Coach, Wanna be Photographer, Special needs advocate, Library enthusiast, Yogi, Mom blogger. Britt lives in a barn on Cape Cod with her husband, two toddlers, and stinky black lab. You can read more of her adventures at You're Somebody's MOTHER.Or if you have a short attention span, follow her on Instagram @somebodys_mother