By, Alexandra Crowley
Now that Daylight Savings has come and gone (#longestdayever), many of us moms dread the long winter days looming ahead. Well, I’m here to tell you, ladies, we are gonna celebrate, yo’!
And here’s a list of five reasons why:
1. Bust out the Fat Jeans: You know those “mom jeans” tucked away in the back of the closet? Pull them babies out to the forefront. Long gone are the summer days of muffin top-bearing tanks and low rise denim. Today, we can officially bust out the Biggies--mid-to-high risers, baggy and cozy. No one, except maybe the huz (#onagoodday), is seeing my trunk junk on the beach.
2. Drink Up Shamelessly: No need to wait ‘till five anymore. The rule that you can drink “when it’s dark out” fully applies now (or is that just my rule?). So you say it’s four? Well, it’s time to pour... It’s dinnertime! We feed those kids around five, so it’s all good and well to start busting out the Pinot Gris while preparing a meal…the French do it; so can we moms. (Note: It’s also fully acceptable to down the grape juice when not preparing a meal…just sayin’).
3. The Children’s Museum: It’s cold out. We’re not throwing out eff bombs looking for beach parking and pulling wagons, and the kids are no longer raking the leaves (#inmydreams). But instead of going through the hell of putting on snow suits, hats, mittens, and boots, let’s rock on out at The Children’s Museum. It’s a built-in play date—just add water. Who says you need to make a plan with another mom? Just load up the kids, head on over and find a mom and her offspring there. One can be a full-on social pariah/sociopath…but at the museum? Everyone’s a winner! Caveat: Wear a Hazmat suit; germs are aplenty. The upside? If you want your kids to be exposed to chicken pox, you don’t need a sleepover with the carrier monkey—just take him to The Children’s Museum. He’s sure to get it there.
4. Screw Workouts: See above? That’s right. It’s cold out. So it’s a valid excuse to skip the jog. And if you’re a gym rat, well, then you also have an excuse: it’s hard to get there in the snow, and/or the wind chill is taking its toll on the air pressure in the car tires (#reallythetiresaroundmywaist). However, you can sport yoga pants all day and appear to have gone to the gym, because they’re not like wearing sweats or pajamas—no one’s gonna judge.
5. Television: Speaking of judging, it’s kind of gross to plant your kids in front of a show on a warm, sunny day. But when it’s snowing? Eff that! Pop some corn and plant the tots. It’s movie day (not just movie hour…movie day). It’s totally okay to exploit the wonders of television when it’s winter. Nick Jr.? He’s no longer your cousin Nick’s son. He’s your BFF.
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